“Aqilah Azmi's Territory”

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Assalamualaikum and hi !


It's raining. My room's windows are ajar. I can smell the rain pouring on tars. Sometimes, there were thunder striking, but not so loud. I can hear the drops falling on my house's roof. And here I am. Sitting on my bed, in front of the laptop in despair.

I want to tell, but only if it is possible. If it is ever important to you. Sometimes my heart pumped so fast, giving me adrenaline effects, forcing me to tell you that

if it is ever feasible to tell you that I love you and how I miss you so much. If I ever could.

I know I've lied to myself few times. I know my mouth is being such a treason for my own heart.
It's just something I couldn't do.







I am living a hectic life right now. I don't know, I feel tired every time. Even now. I'm not having my 'good day' today. Starting from the morning, business problems. I rushed here and there and even when I've arrived at my workplace I still need to be very energetic. I forgot to buy a newspaper and it turns out that everybody here loves to read the Star newspaper so I'm done. I can't make it to have one. FIRST THING TO DO TOMORROW - Drive to UA and buy one! So I spent the whole day doing my works, making business, pretty much enjoying my playlists, works, did I mention works?

Well anyway, I received good feedbacks via emails and I want to thank everyone for that. *hugs* Annd you know the last sentences will always be farewell speeches, so yeah. I wasn't planning to write this anyway. It just popped in my mind that I should really update something about myself too. Goodnight. Okay, so sudah habis. The end :)



"I have found him!"
"Found who?"
"Him!"
"Him who?"
"I found him - My joie de vivre!"

I saw you. A new picture of you uploaded via Instagram. My expressions changed.

I still remember the time we chatted. I was so happy. We talked about everything. Even small, not crucial things. We were having it great. My hopes rose. I used to giggle a little reading your jokes and stories. Everything seems perfect when you are around.

Now vacant, vanished.

Perhaps, I pleased you so much or being too nice or, I don't know. Whenever you stop replying, I feel like an idiot. It is like another failure for me.

I don't mind spending my resting-hours on you. I knew I was so sleepy. I felt like my eyes were bloodshot sore that sometimes I failed to focus and all the words on the chatroom swam. But hey, keep texting. Even if you think you are talking rubbish. Cause you are so important to me. Holding back my tiredness are worth it.

One thing for sure, I am not going to ever reveal this secret.

Hopelessly I'll love you endlessly
Hopelessly I'll give you everything
But I won't give you up
I won't let you down
And I won't leave you falling
If the moment ever comes




It was a dark night. The scent of raindrops brewing in the air. The pedestrians were all with their umbrellas, rushing to get home. The rain faded.

There was a young woman sitting on a bench. She seemed like waiting for someone to pick her up. Not really in rush, she doesn't look worry at all. She just sat there, while staring at the road. Her head turned left and right, searching for a car, a person, nobody knows. Five minutes after, a man came towards her and sat beside her. He looks like a wealthy young adult. Brown hair, tall and fair-skinned. He must be very charismatic. He made the girl talked to him.., or even fell in love with him. Not long after that, a cab stopped by and offered them a ride. The guy asked the girl to come along ; saying he would pay for the fees. Besides, it was almost 12 a.m. The guy promised to send her home. It was a good offer, so she accepted. They seemed happy, maybe one day they could go out together, who knows?

..............................

It was all over the newspapers. Front page. It rang the world. Some of the titles are "Monstrous Killer", "Cab Driver Found Dead", also "Successful Bachelor Sawed in Pieces". It was told that the pieces of both bodies were cut into pieces and thrown into the river, feeding the fishes, making them so difficult to trace. The woman, however, was invisible. Polices and forensics failed to capture her.

............................

People were being so busy preparing for Christmas celebration tomorrow. There was a guy riding his fixie bike delivering pamphlets. Tall, handsome-looking guy in hoodies. He parked his bike and walked into a cafe for some nice hot beverage. He walked out and saw an average-hot girl listening to her Ipod, waiting for someone. She was very beautiful. Looking so good in her boots and skinny jeans. Of course, as expected, he approached her. He greeted her nicely. Her smiles made him fell in love immediately. She asked him to accompany her to her home. He agreed. She presented him a kiss on his cheek. They walked together, holding hands as if they have dated before.


So the cycle continues.

I feel so sleepy right now. Just had a bun, my all-time favourite and some chocolate-flavour ice blended. But still, my fingers are so heavy to even touch this keyboard.




I am going to start working tomorrow at my mother's shop. I am looking forward to have a day out with my best friends here. As expected, I am counting the days I have before taking MUET exam. But now here I am, sitting on my bed with my laptop on my laps while eating M&S caramel wafers. And a bottle of plain water. Assalamualaikum and goood *glancing the wall clock* evening everyone !

Have you ever wake up with a strange feeling of concern, the feeling of afraid of something bad happened to you. You get so paranoid. Well, fear got the best of you. And long come the various of ways and ideas on both these sides ; to solve and to manipulate. A simple advice - be true to yourself. I know it is almost impossible to do good deeds every seconds for a normal-almost-least-pious-level people (yours truly) but how amazing things can appear when you are making things right. Even curses are able to change into sweet euphony. Although it is a simple thing you do like, 'oh look, I didn't lie today', or 'I have managed to avoid myself from being a man with grossly swollen egos,' some very good starting points. Kudos !

Also, that precious feeling you have when you are helping someone who is really desperate and you have manage to solve it. They thank you. With his eyes full of sincerity. Now that is what I am talking ! Do good things, it benefits you and others. Perhaps hundreds. Like removing a rustic nail from a pavement to avoid you, yourself from stepping on it and also the people after you.



It happens to every one to have their own moment that they will find the joy after a great suffer. Sometimes, serendipity can be nothing more than the achievement of good luck. Be it happens on the moment you are doing something or nothing. The power to make important discovery has changing lives through history. And how I wish to tell you on my interest on discussing the abilities of ideas. Now, I'm not saying here that I'm an Einstein neither nor Stephen Hawkings who have their ideas outside the lines that they managed to create things we won't be able to even think of.

Ideas isn't just a word, really. I really idolize the transparency of an idea, which sometimes is insidious but also can be pure as the driven snow. It helps though it destroys. The minds that created ideas are the minds that really golds.




Of course like anybody who just got back from their so-called-second-home must be craving for food. Favourite food, to be exact. Well, same goes to the girl in the picture above. Assalamualaikum and have a very blessing Saturday morning everyone!

I had just unpacked my things from luggage and small bags for laundry. My clothes smell like my dorm and I really don't like the idea that I am missing it. I really miss my neighbourhood, the clean toilet, the bed that always produces weird sounds as if you are creating a volcanic science project on it, my study table which is still a virgin since the past five months, you name it.

So since I have a month for semester break, I had already set up few plans with my friends. Best friends were not here yet, but they are coming, yayyy.

I had a good conversation with my dad yesterday while taking our dinner. I want to be one of the ministers / administrators in Malaysian administration system. More on educations, I suppose. We discuss about the changes I dream to make and the consequences, effects, predicting how many years will it takes, the good and back effects. Is this possible? Well, there's no certainty, only opportunity.



Marital Status : Single



Assalamualaikum and good afternoon world !